Blink.

I blinked.  When I opened my eyes, time had flown by.  Life had passed by.  I had missed fights, break ups, and make ups. Tests and games.  Failures and successes.  I had blinked and missed the prime of my youth.

I blinked.  The time I had missed before seemed to rush back.  No, I couldn’t remember the exact moments we spent together, or the days I pushed you away, but the emotion was there.  Raw and just as painful as it was joyful.

I blinked.  When I looked around, years had passed.  You are further away now – living another life.  And so am I.  I don’t regret that we’ve moved on.  I regret that we didn’t stay close.  I wish I could pick up the phone and tell you…everything.  But we’re too far apart for that.

I blinked.  And when I viewed the world again, I saw you.  In my new world, 1000 miles away from who we were, I still see you.  I see you.  Because I see me.  You’re not with me, but you’ll always be a part of me.  It’s the thing about you that I hate to love the most.

Sometimes I blink and squeeze my eyes shut, hoping that I can open my eyes in the past.  So I can relive my – our – past.  But it never works.  Sometimes my failure gets the best of me and I begin to tear up.  But only a little.  And then I blink.

2:01am    2.9.10