L.O.V.E.

Lauren sat at the diner, unable to move.   She was in shock.  Three years of fear and pain, over.  Her phone sat on the counter, and she could just barely hear the dial tone sounding from when he had hung up.  She felt like she should be crying.  Should be doing something.  But she couldn’t bring herself to do anything at all.  She couldn’t even form coherent thoughts.  The waitress approached, set down the slice of apple pie Lauren had ordered what felt like ages ago, and asked if she wanted whipped cream.  The question snapped Lauren back to reality.  She jumped up, threw down some cash as she grabbed her phone, and she ran out the door.

Once she was on the road, she kept speeding up, weaving in and out of cars.  She cared less about following the rules of the road the further she went.  Everyone was moving too slow.  A drive that should’ve taken ten minutes seemed to take hours.  Her mind, frozen moments before, was racing just as fast as her car.  The past three years had been torture.  She had watched him deteriorate in front of her eyes.  She’d spent day after day, curled in bed with him, praying for a miracle.  He often moaned in his sleep, and as she watched him rest, she cried.  They both did their best to keep it together, but she knew he must’ve cried sometimes too.  She knew that he was in more pain than he let on, but he never told her when it became unbearable, when he wanted to give up and move on.  She feared her presence hurt him in some way, forcing him to act braver than he felt, but she was too selfish to be absent for very long.  His parents never minded that she had practically moved into his room.  She did her best to give them their own time, as much as the time away hurt her.  She had been at the diner for that very reason.  As she pulled into the parking lot, the same thoughts repeated continuously in her mind.  ‘I should’ve been there.   I shouldn’t have left for so long, or gone so far.’  She jumped out of the car, nearly leaving her keys in the ignition, and broke out into a sprint toward the glass sliding doors.

Victor was leaning on the wall outside his son’s room as Lauren approached, his phone still in his hand from when he had called her. She saw that his eyes were red and swollen.  He had been crying in the hall so his wife wouldn’t see.  He sucked in his breath, trying to regain his composure, as he embraced Lauren and kissed her forehead.  He nodded toward the door and followed her inside.  Victor walked to the far side of the bed to join his wife, who was unashamedly sobbing while holding her son’s hand, as Lauren neared the other side.  She took a deep breath, unsure of exactly what to do or say.

Every day for three years had been full of battling for his life.  Prayers, tears, hope, and fear had controlled their every moment.  Each hour seemed too short, each day one less that they had with him.  Seeing him lying in the bed, she knew she’d suffer through it all again with him if it meant she got to experience this exact moment again.  He was weak still, and he looked completely exhausted.  His drooping eyes turned toward her slowly, and she saw something she had feared had been lost forever.  He smiled.  She climbed into the bed next to him, as she had so many times before, and they intertwined their arms.  She glanced toward his parents and whispered, ‘It’s all over?’ They both nodded furiously.  She inhaled, and for the first time in three years, they all cried together.

27.10.09  1:55pm

25.6.10 9:42pm